This too shall pass

I think we've possibly all experienced something in our lives that has just made us want to give up.  Throw in the towel.  Forget it.  Maybe it's financial or work stress.  Relationship struggles.  Friendship drama.  The loss of something/someone great.  And a well meaning family member or friend will walk up to you, give you a hug or pat on the back and say "this too shall pass".

 

It's kind of like that with raising kids.  Thankfully I had wonderful pregnancies both times, but others aren't so lucky.  Those that fought with morning sickness or heartburn or worse were reminded that in just a few short months they would be holding their little one and it would all be worth it.  And then the day came and you weren't sure you'd last delivery, but the nurses said....just a few more minutes and you'll get to meet your little baby girl (or boy).  Be it middle of the night feedings, the terrible two's, potty training, sickness that runs rampant (and a whole host of other things I have yet to experience with my girls) we fight, kick and claw to survive and not to pull our hair out in giant handfuls.  And we are reminded by others (and ourselves) that this too shall pass.

 

Because here is the thing about kids.  They grow up. 

 

BUT, here's the thing....

 

Kids.  Grow.  Up.

 

Think about it.  For every trial, obstacle and hair-pulling day....there are exponentially more days that make you laugh, and give you joy and make you beam with pride. 

 

They aren't going to be this age forever... 

 

Maya & Riley, 9/12/08, 8 days old

 

They aren't going to do this very long...





Teagan and Daddy, 12/9/10, 6 months old



So, yes, this ALL will pass.  It already has.  In the blink of an eye it seems.   And it makes me sad.  And it makes me happy.  And it makes me want to slow down time and make every crazy, hair-pulling day last.  Because one day the house will be way too quiet.  And I'll long for the days when we survived by the skin of our teeth.    

Terrible, trying, testing, tiring Two's

I've never really placed much emphasis on the "terrible two's".  Lots of people actually say the 2's are fine, it's the 3's that'll get ya.  Well, either those people had very little patience with their toddlers or I had the best twins ever!  Maya and Riley were a dream during their 2's and 3's.  They were so inquisitive and funny and playful.  A bad day was just that, a bad day.  Those were isolated and few and far between and definitely not what I'd consider to be "terrible" at all.  For goodness sake, we all have days with meltdowns....even in our 30's!  The twins turned four this fall and their independence continued to grow as they start school and I just couldn't help but pat myself on the back a little for sailing through my first two kids unscathed.  I was in the middle of writing my acceptance speech for mom-of-the-year......

...and then Teagan turned about 2 years and 3 months (right about the time Maya & Riley started school this fall) and my world came crashing down around me.  She is the Tasmanian devil.....and in her swirling vortex of chaos she has entrapped her sisters and brought them along for the ride.  Heaven help me!

I have potty trained and re-potty trained that kid about 3 times since July.  She has a potty mouth of late and lets and occasional explicit word fly or likes to "potty talk".  She is forever the instigator with her sisters and does stuff to them just to be mean.  Our once fun and easy-going family meals have been replaced with constant reprimands and threats and often times her leaving the table with all of us in disgust over another frustrating evening.  I think I say "sit down and take a bite" about 84 times during any given meal.  She rarely sleeps through the night anymore or she is awake at shortly after 6am and stays awake even though since 8 weeks she's slept a solid  11 hours/night 99% of the time.  She gets Maya and Riley worked up and then the 3 of them totally gang up on me or Bill or whatever.  She is headstrong.  And BOY does she have a TEMPER! 

I mean look at her, she marches to the beat of her own drummer....obviously!

So do I have little patience with my toddler?  Or did having Maya & Riley first set the bar too high?

I know that not every child has the same demeanor, even children in the same family, raised by the same parents with the same parenting philosophy.  It's not like I had my first kids a decade ago and now I am just older and more of a lax parent when it comes to stuff which may have triggered different behavior in her.  Time outs have proven ineffective.  Taking away toys and privileges just lead to uber meltdowns.  And swats to the behind seem to slide right off like I stood there and dumped water on a duck's back. 

Some say it's just a phase. 

Others say she's testing me. 

I say "would YOU like to take her for awhile?" 

So, it is what it is until we figure out what to do.  I guess.  I will continue to show her acceptable behavior and certainly not tolerate outright disobedience or dangerous actions.  I hope that this is short-lived or she may find herself grounded from her Senior prom before she enters pre-K. 

But the best part is knowing that she's only going to be this age for a short while.  She's still my lovey, snugly TT.  She still gives me the biggest hugs and says "I love you mommy, you're my beeessst friend".  She still crawls in bed with me on weekend mornings and give kisses and she still wants to be a big helper with dishes, laundry, playing games or whatever.  She is testing me.  This is just a phase.  This is probably also just her attempting to be more independent like her big sisters and making sure she's not forgotten.  But how we ALL treat this time in her life will help her become the person she is meant to be.  Not every kid is perfect.  Not every parent will be mom-of-the year.  But we are who we are because of each other and in spite of what may happen for a few months or a year out of our lives. 

I mean, come on, any kid that watches TV hugging her rocking horse deserves to be cut a little slack...

(But maybe you could cut me some slack if you see me some day and I look a little worn out.  Thanks in advance!) 

Up for the challenge

What challenges you?  It can be BIG or small, but if it's important to you, it's a challenge just the same.  Recently I have been beating myself up lately for falling so ridiculously far behind on my scrap booking.  I love to do it, I love the memories I can just flip through anytime I want.  I started scrap booking back in the early 2000's.  I spent countless hours with some amazing friends laughing, creating, sharing....it was a good creative outlet and a wonderful way to enjoy time with friends.  And as life goes.....we all got busy, busier, and even busier yet.  Our once-monthly crop sessions that we held religiously dwindled to once every few months....and as of now, I struggle to remember when the last time we had one.  I think I might have been newly pregnant with Teagan.  Hence the reason I don't have time to scrapbook anymore!!!

 

On her first birthday (June 2011) I was 100% caught up on all my scrapbook pages.  And to date.....I have only scrap booked one page since then.  Which means.....I am a year and a half behind.....multiplied by 3 kids......which means 77 layouts behind....give or take.

 

So I am thinking I'll just forget it.  Upload some memory books to Shutterfly, and call it done. 

 

But then the picture below is a common occurrence at our house. 

 

 

 

 

The girls LOVE to look through their scrapbooks. They love to see pictures of themselves and family, special trips we have taken and holidays past. So, it's because of them that I accept the challenge of getting caught up....and (attempt to) stay caught up.  I spent two and a half hours yesterday while they were napping tagging the past 5 months of pictures.  So, another 5 months to go today.  Then I have to print them all, select the paper, and get down to the work of creating.  By my calculations of a reasonable amount of pages I can complete in a month.....I should be caught up on the past year and a half....in approximately 10 months.....which then makes me 10 more months behind.

 

But, whatever.  I am doing it because my girls love it.  I am doing it because it's something I am proud of and it allows me to let off a little steam.  I am doing it because I love a challenge!

Girls gone...wild?!?!?!

This was to be a week for the memory books! Bill was traveling to Denver Monday through Friday and the girls and I were going to kick it up and live large all week. They were back to gymnastics Monday night, we were going to have a PJ pizza party, get really crafty with some of our new Christmas toys, prepare Teagan's room for a special delivery...... and then Monday night arrived. Following gymnastics Teagan got hit with the stomach bug. And then Tuesday Maya and Riley got it. And after cleaning up after the 3 of them....I got a turn (fun!!) and spent the next 2 days down-and-out. Our week of girl fun = EPIC FAILURE!

Reinforcements arrived. We muddled through the week. Did about 8 (extra) loads of laundry. Managed to get everyone feeling better. I am glad we don't get sick very often. As a matter of fact, I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've been sick in the past 10 years. I knew we'd be in for more of our far share this year, what with the girls taking lots of swims in the "germ pool" of school and gymnastics.

What we did get out of our week as a little fun.  Teagan's big girl furniture arrived Wednesday and she is set to go!  The twins had career day today and Maya was a ballerina and Riley was a baker!  (You'll have to take my word for it, because Blogger is being difficult and I am unable to upload the photos).  Daddy came home from his business trip (with souvenirs)...and we all continued to improve.   Maybe next time Daddy travels we'll just aim for "normal". 

Making a come back

Well, considering I haven't had the time (or taken the time) to blog in about 5 weeks, this is my great come back!  December was a whirlwind for our family. Following Thanksgiving the time seemed to spiral out of control with baking, decorating, shopping, wrapping, Christmas programs at school, holiday plans, Bill's birthday and then Christmas and New Years themselves. We (thankfully) had more ups than downs and hopefully in between the hustle-bustle and chaos, we managed to make some good memories for our family.

I'd like to say I had made a resolution to blog more this year or to catch up on the scrapbooks I have fallen desperately behind on, but as resolutions go, most are long forgotten or already blown by the time the last of the holiday leftovers are purged from the frig and the last of the Christmas decorations are back in storage.  I am not much of a resolution person.  Sure, I have goals and I strive to reach those goals, but I don't have to sit down and make a grand promise to myself at the beginning of each new year.  Most of us want to spend a little less, save a little more....or eat a little less and work out a little more....or work a little less and travel a little more.  Whatever the case may be, I don't think we necessarily have to made grand gestures on the eve of every new year.  If you are such a person, GOOD FOR YOU!  I can only hope that whenever we chose to set a goal for ourselves, or make a resolution, it's important enough to us that we see it through, to the best of our ability, every day!

So for the foreseeable future my goal is to be the best "me" I can be.  To have fun with my kids every day.  To take more QUALITY time with my husband.  To turn over to God what I cannot understand, control or handle myself.  To let the small stuff slide.  To take a break to write, or scrapbook, read or workout "just because".  And I know there are days I will fail miserably at one or more of those goals.  But that's the beauty of making a come back.

Each day is a new opportunity. And if we missed out or messed up, what a great way to start all over. Every morning is a chance to make a come back. So if the promises you made to yourself or the resolutions already broken, don't wait another year to make new goals. Make a new goal every day. Even if it's the same goal as yesterday or the day before....make a come back. Make it important enough to work on. Every. Single. Day.